ADVICE
   
   
My name is the AnswerMan. I am here to answer any questions you may have about anything. I was an advice columnist for 15 years for 4 small papers across the United States. I've won 3 regional journalism awards, and my arms are larger than both Ann Landers' and Abigail Van Buren's arms combined. Then, HARO Online came along and offered me a position here at HARO Online. Looking for a change, I've now brought my deep intelligence here, to help you out. E-mail me your questions at AnswerMan@haro-online.com.
   
   
Q:

January 20, 2004

Dear Answerman,

Hi there, I am trying to form a Social Club for my office and I would like to find a site that would inform me about the rules and regulaions that applies to such a club in Montreal, Qc. Thanks for your help

paul k.

   
A:

Dear paul k.,

Yes, I'm still around. Sorry I haven't been answering much. I have other jobs to pay the bills and to keep Mrs. Answerman happy.

   
   
Q:

December 11, 2003

Dear Answerman,

what's a MOJO?? I've watched Austin Powers 100 times and still don't know what it is???

ScttHoney

   
A:

Dear ScttHoney,

Yeah, the ABC Television Network has given David Lynch a pretty raw deal. First, they make him reveal a killer for Twin Peaks then they cancel it, then they cancel his show On The Air, then they axe Mulholland Drive before it even hit the small screen. We'll see what happens next.

   
   
Q:

December 30, 2003

Dear Answerman,

I'm from Belgium (Europe), my question is : What's a PIMP ? and what does P.I.M.P. stand for ?

Thanks Henri MPIA

   
A:

Dear Henry MPIA,

You're actually confusing two movies, both of which coincidentally have the same scenes of Jennifer Connelly standing at the end of a pier, facing the ocean while the main guy walks up behind her. The first is Dark City and the second is Requiem For a Dream. They are both good movies, and the scene is striking in both of them.

   
   
Q:

March 13, 2001

Dear Answerman,

I was wondering what was it that Heather found in the pile of sticks-wrapped up in Josh's shirt.

tabfl

   
A:

Dear tabfl,

Keep trying and I'm sure one day you'll make it.

   
Q:

March 12, 2001

Dear Answerman,

Supp?? OK well, I have a question...Is Katherine Hepburn the actress still alive??? Pleaze write back. Will me and my crush Nick J. go out??? Pleaze write back.

Mackenzie H.

   
A:

Dear Mackenzie H.,

You need to sit down and consider how much you value your friendship. It it is important to you, you need to fight to salvage it. And if it is important to you and something you treasure and are willing to work to fix, then in the future when you look back on this fight, it won't amount to much.

   
Q:

March 12, 2001,

Dear Answerman,

Hi, I was wondering if you could be able to help me. I am a fifth grade teacher and I was interested in obtaining the script for Chicken Run in order to create reading skill lessons for my class. Would you know where and if this may be located? Thank you very much for your help.

Trisha H.

   
   
A:

Dear Trisha H.,

You are in a very dangerous situation. I would pack immediately, take your children, and leave him. Staying any longer would not be a good idea. But leave your fuzzy slippers.

   
Q:

March 12, 2001

Question: I'd like to copy one of the hairtyles of Julia Styles in the movie Down to You. It was sort of a braided updo. Who can I contact? Thanks.

Beth

   
A:

Dear Beth,

I don't know that I completely buy the record label's agreements against file sharing. I'm sure that Napster, Morpheus, Kazaa, and every other program have had some effect on sales, but they also have their heads up their butts. First, if they lower the price of new CDs, people will buy more. CD prices keep rising, and what's worse is how little it costs to print a CD. Plus, what kind of deal am I getting if I'm paying close to $20 for a music CD when I can pay a few dollars more and buy a DVD that has a longer running time plus a whole bunch of extra nifty things?

   
Q:

March 10, 2001

Hello Answerman,

My problem is when I try to download something form the internet. My computer tells me I need an aol.exe program to open the file. I have look for this program in my computer bud does not have this program. Is there any way I can get this program?

cuervo13

   
A:

Dear cuervo13,

Before stepping foot into a dealership, I would search online and figure out exactly what you want. There are plenty of websites to help you determine what price is proper. Know what features you want, exactly how much you're willing to pay, then go to a credit union and get a pre-approved rate so you can bargain. Remember, this is WAR.

   
Q:

March 7, 2001

Dear Answerman,

I am building a new ranch home in Plainview, NY. We have a basement. The builder has given me an upgrade to prefinished floors in the kitchen and living area. My question to you is, what is the difference between refinished floors and the floor they will put down and finnish the floor after its down? In the house. The brand is Century flooring 3/4 thick 2 1/4 wide.

Thank you.

Edwin J.

   
A:

Dear Edwin J.,

Well, nobody who lives there calls if Frisco. If you want to blend in, that's the first thing you need to stop doing.

   
Q:

March 6, 2001

Hello,

I just wanted to know why you did not like Hollow Man featuring Kevin Bacon and Elisabeth Shue? Maybe the script is not original, but it is still an eye-catching thriller that I think is very life-like. It's very suspenseful and I just need to know what's so bad about it.

Kitkat8816

   
A:

Dear Kitkat8816,

No, that's not Corey Haim. You're thinking of Corey Feldman.

   
Q:

March 5, 2001

Dear Answerman,

I have AOL 6.0 and I can download large animation files such as Milkshape but AOL can't read them. A pop-up screen says that I need aol.exe to get this file. Do you know how I'd get this or how to find it on my computer's C:\ drive?

CidHighwind648

   
A:

Dear CidHighwind648,

I think the real question is whether or not LL Cool J has it in his contract that he must die at some point in each movie.

   
Q:

March 4, 2001

Sir:

My friends and I were trying to think of the name of the movie Marlin Brando played in where he was a mortocycle rider dressed in black leather. I said it was Wild One but I'm not sure. Could you give me the answer? They asked me because I am an old fogie and they thought I might know the answer (75 years young)

Raymond A.

   
A:

Dear Raymond A.,

What is this, The Economist?

   
Q:

March 4, 2001

Dear Answerman,

I was wondering if you could help me without giving some stupid answer that is totally irrelevant to the quistion. Like if I ask you if a fish has knuckles you shouldn' tell me that maybe she would love me if I did my homework by the river. "GET MY DRIFT?"

O.K. My real question is, do you know of any chat rooms where you walk around in a visible room and approach the person you would like to chat with? If so, could you please tell me the names of them or even just tell me what the name of an environment such as this would be considered?

PLEEEEEEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Signing off,

King Tutt

   
A:

Dear King Tutt,

Hi there! I'm the Answerman. I'm here to answer all your quistions.

   
Q:

March 3, 2001,

Dear Answerman,

Help...recently necessary files were deleted from my computer causing me to re-install Windows again. Using Windows 98 on my pc. While using AOL I cannot get into the WEB anymore. It says "the page cannot be displayed" click refresh. And it doesn't work. The url address changes to: res//C:\WINDOWS\SYSTEM\SHDOCOC.DLL/dnserror.htm#http://. I found this file in explorer under the system folder. I also have AOL running OK and WEB access OK on my laptop - that's what I am using now. What can I do to get connected to the web on my desktop? Can I copy something from the working laptop??? If yes, what folder do I copy it to on the desktop pc?

Thanks so much!!!! GOING CRAZY!!!!!

Lois L.

   
A:

Dear Lois L.,

Prenatal care is extremely important. Please make it an immediate priority to see your doctor for the safety of both you and your baby.

   
Q:

March 2, 2001

Dear Answerman,

I was wondering if you could tell me the name of the song in Love and Basketball when they were having sex after they both decided they were going to USC. I bought the soundtrack but the song is not on there. Please e-mail me back.

borisjohnson

   
A:

Dear borisjohnson,

Sounds pretty normal to me.

   
Q:

March 1, 2001

Dear Answerman,

hi my name is mallory. i am 11 years old. i want to know what a comet is for my science report. can you help me? please e-mail me soon.

*mal*

   
A:

Dear *mal*,

Well, I am Answerman, not Haro or Mongoose. I did see The Legend of 1900, but it was on cable. It is not currently available on video or DVD.

   
Q:

March 1, 2001

Dear Answerman,

A few days ago I saw the movie Princess Mononoke and that anime was just incredable. It is like no other anime or movie I have seen. The ending left me curious...I was wondering if the director, I always forget his name, is going to come out with a sequel to Mononoke or if there is anouther movie out that is based on the same cast? One more thing, If you know anything about if the movie is based on a Japainese legend or is it entirely made up? If you have any information please share it with me

Bobby

   
A:

Dear Bobby,

It sounds like you are living with a jerk. He doesn't want you, he wants your money and your apartment. The fact that you are hesitating shows that you know better. Kick his butt out of there.

   
Q:

March 1, 2001

Dear Answerman,

What do I need to do to purchase this movie, American Pimp?

DEE14K

   
A:

Dear DEE14K,

Upside down stamps on letters are meant to represent how you are annoyed with bills. It was started a couple of months ago as a way to protest, but sadly, not enough people know about it and it only looks weird.

   
Q:

February 27, 2001

Dear Answerman,

Hi my name is Shameka H. and I'm in the 6th didn't flunk no grade and I'm 12. I loved the movie "Love and Basketball." Matter of fact I have the movie. I liked it first of all because the characters were well acted together, I love playing basketball, and it was sad, funny, and a love type of movie. I know you can't give out "Omar Epps" and "Sanna Lathan" screen names out but could you ask them to e-mail me. I would really want to see out it turning out for them. Also I would like to know if they are together as a couple? If not do they spend time together? If they do go together as a couple then how long have they been going out, before or after the movie? In the movie the "Wood" I realized Sanna Lathan had the same mark as she did when she played in the movie "Love and Basketball" when Omar pushed her down in the beginning of the movie. Please pretty please ask them if they would be so kind and e-mail or im me. I would love to learn or now more about talented people. If they can't im or e-mail tell them they should make another movie with me too. Just playing. Well anyway if you could tell them they need to make movies together lots of them.

Shameka H.

   
A:

Dear Shameka,

The words to the song are actually "who's gonna save me," not "who's gonna shave me." Yes, the guy singing is bald, but come on.

   
Q:

February 24, 2001

Dear Answerman,

Hi, my name is Brenda. How would I go about finding information on a jack-in-the-pulpit signed blown vase by w. cisboiu?

Needing your help,

Brenda

   
A:

Dear Brenda,

Well, it's really hard to get rid of telemarkers. However, you can still piss them off. Some of them cannot make another call until you hang up the phone. So just listen to their spiel and interrupt them when you normally do, and when you say goodbye, just don't hang up. Set the phone down, or leave it by your ear. Sometimes, they can disconnect the line. Other times, they just sit there waiting, and you may possibly hear a pathetic "can you hang up the phone" after a little while. They wasted your time, you may as well waste theirs. And it will cost them a teensy bit more for their phone bill, but just think if everybody does it...

   
Q:

February 24, 2001

Dear Answerman,

Where can my nefues and I see Thomas and his friends in England in beginning of July?

AKIPAULWATKINS

   
A:

Dear AKIPAULWATKINS,

When hanging a flag vertically (stripes going up and down) the proper place for the stars is the upper left. So the stars are on the upper left, and the red and white stripes hang down. The blue on the right may look better to some people, but it is not 'correct.'

   
Q:

February 24, 2001

Hi Answerman,

I HAVE DOWNLOADED "CALL WAVE" (INTERNET ANSWERING MACHINE), BUT WHENEVER I TRY TO USE IT, IT DOES COME ON THE SCREEN BUT WITH A NOTICE THAT I DO NOT HAVE THE AOL.EXE FILE THAT IS NEEDED FOR IT TO WORK --- AND THE TOOL BAR HAS AN "X" ON IT. HOW DOES IT WORK? THANKS,

~H~

   
A:

Dear ~H~,

I have read that book, and I love it. It was a simple to read but fully engrossing account of the tragic events that happened that May on Everest. If you read it and like it, I suggest you rent Everest, the IMAX movie. It chronicles some of the same events from a different perspective. Although it loses a lot watching it on a television, the visuals are still magnificent.

   
Q:

February 24, 2001

Dear Answerman,

How can I see "One Day in September?" Is it playing somewhere? Is it on video?

Eric

   
A:

Dear Eric,

Your heartwarming story reaffirms the strong love between two brothers. And the importance of good dental hygiene and boomerangs.

   
Q:

February 23, 2001,

Dear Answerman,

I'm a young african male 32. Looking to find Rubin Carter to maybe HELP ME! I can understand what a person like him must have gone through,and this is why I'm asking for him to maybe Help me and my cause.This is something I feel compelled to do,because I'm running out of time. I know he deserves to live now, but if a person like him could spare the time for someone like me and just maybe look at my documentation. I'm not asking for money or fame just one simple thing the truth. Even if Mr.Carter never recieves this GOD! bless him and the people who helped free him. He's more than a hero or a person but a icon for all people alike,and should be reconized for it. Oh! almost forgot his friends (ANGELS). There's no words to explain what happened to him. THANK YOU

PATRICK.C

   
A:

Dear PATRICK. C,

I've mentioned it before, and I'll state it again. Those AT&T Wireless commericals with the shepherds are some of the most annoying things on television and radio right now. Who cares if your cousin/uncle/neighbor the shepherd has a cell phone? What is the point of these commercials? They're not terribly clever. Maybe they figure they can annoy enough people to buy their products so that they will have such a commanding share of the market that they will no longer need to advertise. If only.

   
Q:

February 22, 2001,

Dear Answerman,

MATTHEW LILLARD IS HOTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 SLC Punk was an AWESOME movie you need to make another one..... PLEASE!!??!?!

PRiMuS567

   
A:

Dear PRiMuS567,

I wouldn't order for her anymore when you take her out. I know you think it's chivalrous, but she's said that it annoys her. In general, it seems pretty antiquated and rude.

   
Q:

February 19, 2001

Dear Mr. Answer Man:

My name is Sean and I am a 14 year old girl, who recently saw Snow Falling On Cedars. What I would like to know, is how they mad it appear that Ethan Hawke had no left arm. The other thing I would like to know, is there any way, if you know it, that you can give me Ethan Hawke's e mail address. Thaere are some questions and comments I would like to ask him. I am not on of those obsessed teens. I just thought that he and Youki Kudoh were magnificent. Thank you for your time. If I think of any more questions, can I e mail them to you???

Sean N.

   
A:

Dear Sean N,

Just dump the jerk.

   
Q:

February 17, 2001

Dear Answerman,

I was asked that only one other animal besides the human sweats. What is it?

Richard S.

   
A:

Dear Richard S.,

Although I'll probably get lynched for this, let me say that I'm not a big fan of Julia Roberts. She's a good actor, but I don't think she's great. What was so great about Erin Brockovich? Her speech at the Academy Awards just did it for me. So many people saw it as sweet, when in actuality, it was arrogant. Every other winner followed the rule, what made her so special that she could ramble on and on? More deserving people have waited longer for an Oscar, and some have yet to win. Even worse was when she told the 'stick man' to be quiet. Hello? He won an Oscar too! How would she like it if somebody referred to her as 'teeth woman?'

   
Q:

February 17, 2001

Dear Answerman,

Hi, I wanted to know how I can get more information on "Elin", or Alexandra Dahlstrom. I have been wondering about her ever since the film of Show Me Love. Please help me.

Austin

   
A:

Dear Austin,

I agree completely with the Supreme Court on their recent ruling in the Martin case. So what if he needs to ride a golf cart? He can still play the game. It's ridiculous to say that the walking is part of the physical demands of the game. If golfers really felt that way, they should abandon caddies and carry their own clubs.

   
Q:

February 16, 2001

Dear Answerman,

As a real de Haro, as I hope you are, I must ask where you really came from and why is Haro your official title? I go to the real Haro, Spain in 3 months to search for our family's true roots. I hope the locals there are friendly and generous with their vino. You know, they say the wine there is good and the history rich. Roman ruins found outside of town dating from about 2,000 yrs ago. Please let me know if you have access to websites or books about the history of Haro. It's hard to come by from here. Will let you know what I find but would like to go there better prepared. Please advise and best of luck in shedding the adult section. Do enjoy the movie reviews as I am an amateur critic. Traffic was great. When is Tarantino gonna come out with a new, good film?

Rafael A.

   
A:

Dear Rafael A.,

That is a big problem. Call the police immediately.

   
Q:

February 16, 2001

Dear Answerman,

Hi, I'm interested in telling a dramatic true story of events. The story consists of a missing person, possible murder, demolition of a historical building and many, many more events all which happen to one family in Sacramento, California. It involves Henry and Mario Moreno, which are brothers. A web site is on the internet of the last episode to take place, the address is Brickhouse1915@att.net, the other archives are listed in newspapers and news media coverage about the recent misfortune of Mario. Henry has been missing for 4 years and all signs report that he is the victim of fowl play. The twist to the story is that, the family believes all of this is the work of a local bailbonds-man here in Sacramento...the story is very complicated and the police have never been able to have enough evidence to convict anyone because of the noterery of the accused. The story has proof and documented itinerary notes of factual events that have not been able to prosecute the proper person responsible. It'a a very worthable piece of news, but I don't know who to talk to anymore or who to trust, it's a very "Erin Brockavich" situation. Do you have any answers for me?

Thanks, Grubbysgirl24

   
A:

Dear Grubbysgirl24,

When you invest, remember that you are investing for the long term. The market will always go up and down, but historically has gone up over time. Pulling your money out and putting it back in will only cause you more stress. Study up on what kind of investor you are, then let your money stay put.

More...